note: I am writing this from my own perspective and how it may apply to women. I realize a lot of these things, like insecurity, can apply to both sexes. Just wanted to throw that out there. :)

I almost titled this why “we” love drag queens, but I don’t want to make assumptions about others. Whether or not this applies to other people, that’s for them to decide.

I adore drag queens, but I didn’t really get exposed to queens until I moved to San Francisco. I immediately fell head over heels in love. Anytime I see a queen perform or even just getting ready for a performance, I wish I could be her. But why exactly I love queens is something I could not quite articulate.

Just a few moments ago, I was reading the 2012 State of Drag survey on Next Magazine’s website when suddenly, it hit me:

I adore and idolize these elements of queens mentioned in the survey!

They are confident. Beautiful. Sexy. They have been made fun of EVEN WHEN THEY LOOK AMAZING. But even after going through being mocked and insulted, they still answer that they feel confident, beautiful and sexy (and by the way almost half mention they feel just as confident out of drag). They make no apologies. Not only that, they view each other as friends. Sisters. There is camaraderie. 

All those elements aren’t just something I noticed due to this survey. I am friends with several queens. It’s just seeing it in writing and in this survey format that I really “get” why I love queens so much.

What woman has not felt unsure of herself? What woman has not gone through insecurity? There have been times when I was feeling confident, or good about myself, only to be mocked or insulted. It happened as far back as 3rd grade, continued to happen and It still happens to this day. Don’t feed the trolls, I know, but it’s not like a troll NEVER made me doubt myself.

When I think about someone mocking queens, I am flabbergasted. Drag queens are beautiful! Amazing! How could anyone say anything bad about them?!

And when I think about it, I imagine that these queens may doubt themselves in that moment of being mocked too, just like I have. They are people, after all. But the difference is that they brush it aside and keep doing what they are doing despite the jerks.

When I see these beautiful queens - each beautiful in her own way - full of confidence and obviously feeling sexy and certain of herself, I am in awe. It seems almost effortless. And when I see all the queens considering each other sisters, supporting each other, it really makes my heart swell. 

I adore queens and strive to be like them. I think all women, especially those that struggle with confidence, could take some cues from the amazingness that is drag.

On that note, here are some of my favorite queens EVER:

The Rice Rockettes and Peaches Christ

(Some of the queens in the Rice Rockettes I am friends with and squeeeeee <3)

A few more of the Rice Rockettes:

They seriously are my most favorite. Their performances are so above and beyond from the choreography to the song choices. I die.

Other queens (mostly from Drag Race - watching the show makes me feel more attached to them! haha):

Latrice Royale

Carmen Carrera

Raja

Sharon Needles

Raven

Honey Imaman Moahogany

Shangela (who you may have seen on Community … “Pocket Full of Hawthornes”!)

Pandora Boxx

Jujubee

And last but not least, and OBVIOUSLY A FAVORITE, RuPaul:

p.s. RuPaul lived in San Diego and has said that she felt like she never truly belonged there, and felt that Atlanta was truly her home. I’m from San Diego and then I moved to San Francisco and the bay area and feel the SAME WAY. Not only is she fabulous but girl I feeeeeel youuuu. :D

myfriendsaremarried:

I am loving this blog! Even though I am getting married in four months, hahaha. Sorry for the flurry of reblogs. I can’t help myself. :P

This is also my reaction to quotes about love and marriage around a household. With a mix of this:

To each their own though…I guess. :P

note: in case you are wondering “Well what the heck do YOU guys have in your house hold?” here’s your answer - we have Spaghetti Western posters, retro Sci-Fi film posters and video game posters all around our house. Also, Star Wars stuff. Now you know why I agreed to marry him. 

This is what I do with my time when I’m A. tired and B. waiting for my pb and butter mix to cool in the fridge…

Hey everyone. There is now a fundraising page for our Goddaughter Mari (I posted about her condition in this post).

There are several concerns about her staying in the hospital so far away from home. First and most importantly, Mari wants to go home. Second, it’s where the parents support system is — they do not have family in the bay area nor their main team of Doctors to help Mari. Three, because Mari may be hospitalized for several more weeks or months, this will put a serious financial burden on her parents if they are not back home so at least one parent can continue working while the other cares for Mari.

Unfortunately, Mari’s insurance will not cover the medical flight home. This means that her parents are in dire need of help to cover the medical flight out-of-pocket. 

If you can, please help bring Mari home!

I’ve made a lot of updates on twitter about our Goddaughter Mari and how she is currently in the hospital right now in critical condition. Many have been asking about her and what’s wrong, so I figured a blog post would be the best way to explain everything. Her Mom also asked me to work on writing a blog post for a website that they have that is all about Mari in order to keep everyone up to date, so I will crosspost additional updates here if her parents OK it.

My fiance met Maya and Jamie (before they were parents) about the time he first moved to the bay area. I met him around a month later and through him I met Maya and Jamie. We had a few mutual friends between us all and over the years we all become very close friends. An entire group of us went to Mari’s baptism in Seattle (where Maya and Jamie are originally from) and we all love and adore her.

In July of 2010, Mari was diagnosed with Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA) Type 1. From her parents journal entry at the time of her diagnosis:

Her condition means that the nerve cells in her spinal cord are being damaged over time, and eventually she will succumb to this disease. It starts at her feet and works its way up her body from there until she is too weak to breathe, and swallow.

It also means that when Mari gets sick it’s much harder for her to get better than the average person. Hospital visits have often been necessary to ensure that she has help to get through the sickness as her condition makes it more difficult. Due to Mari’s condition, Maya and Jamie made the decision to move back to Seattle to be closer to family which was of course the best decision for Mari’s health and happiness.

When Mari is not dealing with sickness she is a very vibrant, happy, animated little girl. She is incredibly smart and even has the advanced verbal skills of a four year old! She loves books and animals and is even quite the fashionista, always rocking bright colors, stripes, polka dots and animal print (a girl after my own heart). 

Her parents decided to come back to the bay area for a visit. They got in to town on Wednesday of last week. The next day, they noticed a change in Mari’s mood and a large increase in her sleeping habits, and knowing their little girl so well, they knew this was not normal. They were concerned and took her to the hospital. 

From her parents journal after going to the hospital:

Initially, it looked like she had pneumonia, and a partially collapsed lung. The doctors, kept us overnight and we planned on getting the first plane back to Seattle. During the night she went into respiratory distress, and was transferred to the PICU at Children’s Hospital. 

Today, we found out that Mari actually ended up catching the common cold. In the past, she has been able to fight off such sickness before  (she even fought off pneumonia not long ago) and eventually she would get well again and return home.

This time for some reason it does not seem to be getting any better and unfortunately they were not able to go back to Seattle because she is in critical condition. They discussed possibly getting her back home via med plane, but Mari’s body is still not getting enough oxygen without a BiPAP machine, thus she is not stable enough to be sent home at all.

We also found out today that because her conditioned worsened, she will likely be hospitalized for weeks, possibly even a few months. 

This is especially awful news because — and this is incredibly hard to get out and write — if her condition worsens and she doesn’t get better, her parents decided a while ago that it’s best to focus on Mari’s quality of life. That she should be comfortable rather than on machines for the duration of her life. 

It is very difficult to imagine what her parents must be going through. They are amazing people and really above and beyond amazing, loving parents. It is an extremely, terribly awful hand that they’ve been dealt. It’s difficult to imagine a  child who is so incredibly young, wonderful, vibrant and overall incredible to go through this.

As Mari’s godparents, we of course have been doing all we can to be there for her and her parents through this tough time. We love her, as do many others.  For those of you who are reading this: if you pray, please pray for Mari. If you believe in the power of positive thought, please send those positive thoughts and vibes out for Mari. She needs those prayers and thoughts now more than ever.